Inspiration...

One step at a time...

On my run this morning, I was wondering what keeps me going back for more week after week.  For I do not have particularly healthy lungs (they have always been my weak spot) and as a result, sometimes my runs feel like very hard work.  I thought of so many things that are a source of inspiration that I ended up spending my entire run listing them in my head.  Here are just a few (in no particular order):

• My five children.  I want to be vital and alive to celebrate and support them for many years to come.
• The two elderly men who look like they are at least in their 80's.  I see them on my morning run most weeks.  They are so vital and fit for men their age and I want what they have.
• The people that I see on my route day in and day out.  Although we don't know each other's name, we smile and wave and encourage each other along.
• The elderly lady who can barely shuffle one block after her surgery.  But she's out there almost every day doing the best that she can.
• The colleagues and the partner who I have started running and swimming with at lunch.  They kick my butt (in a kind way) and make me realise that there is always room to improve.
• The fact that I have not had bronchitis since I started running (hope I am not tempting the Gods by writing this).
• Rob, who regularly reminds me how far I have come when I get a bit discouraged.
• The fact that I have legs and a waist again.  They may be far from perfect after having 5 kids, but I like them anyway.
• My cousin Ann who has 2 children (and another on the way), yet still finds time for marathons.  And my long time friend Gretch who has been running half-marathons for a few years.
• My friend Hils who has shared the entire journey with me.  We keep each other going emotionally and physically.
• My friend Leo and his poem Sitting Under Three Oaks ( http://ladanconia.blogspot.com/2011/05/046-sitting-under-three-oaks.html ) about an old dry oak leaf living out the last of his days "with the spirit of a child, innocent and rebellious".  There are benefits to going with the flow of life, but this poem reminds me that it's also okay to put up a fight and squeeze the most out of our lives.
• The sun, the rain and the local birds who make my heart soar when I am running.
• The contribution that running has made to managing my life long challenges with anxiety (that may be a topic for a separate post).

And the list goes on and on and on...

And then there was running...

Moments after finishing my first half-marathon

It started with only being able to walk for 15 minutes at a time.  I had been struggling with anxiety and depression, was overweight and beginning to have what felt like irregular heart beats.  I was grieving the end of my childbearing years and felt the best years of my life were over. A partner that I work with would discuss his approach to healthy eating and his running adventures with me periodically and it stuck. I thought walking might at least help me to lose a bit of weight so I slowly built up to an hour.

I decided one day to alternate between walking for 15 minutes and jogging for 1 minute.  Over time I realised that I was jogging more than I was walking.  I still remember the first day that I ran without stopping, including my killer local hill.  I jumped up and down and cheered like a little kid.  I entered a 5K Corporate Challenge race which I completed.  I planned on running a 10K race next, but a colleague and a friend both suggested I train for a half-marathon instead.  My cousin was running half-marathons and was training for a marathon which amazed me and the seed was planted.

I did not expect to finish the half-marathon but I trained anyway.  To my amazement I not only finished it but did so in a respectable 2 hours 3 minutes.  Then another colleague suggested that we sign up for a triathlon this November.  I hadn't planned on tackling this challenge until next year, if at all.  But here I am training for another half-marathon in September and swimming and biking to train for the triathlon in November.  And this has been the pattern.  Me constantly underestimating what I can accomplish, giving it a try anyway and surprising myself.

Some amazing things have happened along the way.  I started eating for nutrition instead of weight loss - I am Eating To Live (more on this in another post).  I have started to accept, like and maybe even love myself as I am, character defects and all.  The world doesn't feel so dangerous anymore.  I have a sense of my self worth and am becoming better at expressing myself.  I feel more fit and sexy than I did in my 20's and 30's.  I look at the possibilities instead of the obstacles.  And I have only begun....

Life, part II....

Me after my 5th child

Me now

At 47 (and after having my 5th child at 45) this historically slightly overweight and always non-athletic mum recently completed her first half-marathon.  I am now training for another half-marathon and an (almost) Olympic length triathlon towards the end of the year.  In the process I have discovered new personal dimensions and a determination that I didn't know I was capable of.  I am an athlete, I am a runner.  

This first post is not meant to be an exhaustive blow by blow of each kilo lost and each kilometre run.  As I write this I am laying in my king size bed in my pyjamas surrounded by 5 slowly waking children ranging from 2 to 11. So by necessity I must keep this brief.  There will be plenty of time to discuss how I got here, what has worked for me, what hasn't and how this journey has impacted and continues to impact my life.

For now I simply say, with a willingness to give it a go anything is possible!